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This is a story about a plain christian who experienced two hard times of giving birth to two children. His human shell has been crushed and thus his soul flowed out and was transformed. He ended up became a community helper. I am the main character of this story. Starting from my family, I kept walking on the timeline, Contrary to my expectation, I had to face the suffering of procreating children with my wife. It made our dream broken though my marriage was blessed. One died years ago and the other was disable. During the process, I felt I was walking in a deep and shadowy valley of despair. Fortunately, the Light guided me walk out of the darkness and I was reborn thoroughly. In the suffering, I felt identified with others’ feelings when they faced the same situation . I began to sympathize other people who are in suffering and have concern for them.Whenever I saw the suffers, I immediately thought of my two children. The spontaneous and unconditional action of helping people gradually took shape. Helping and connecting with each other formed the whole story of my family. This is also the pilgrimage of faith, hope and love. The main purpose of this thesis is: 1. to perceive,digest and comprehend the torments in the past through self-narrative so I can put things together in my life, and find the lost pearls which I treasured most in order to obtain the new nourishment and to examine the weary with the new view; 2.to search the details of difficulties, the patterns of adjustment and new possibilities during the process of the helping-mission practice by narrative, dialogues, consideration, release, disconstruction and reconstruction; 3.to find the proper expression that masses can easily go over by sharing my own story so to convey the ideas of transforming the negative feelings into positive power of adjustment, and the suffers’ hearts can be ncouraged. In pace with the process of writing and narrative, I gradually realized that there were a great deal of powers which touched me so much. There were tears and smiles in each shining moment. I was inspired to press on in any difficult situations, because I need to perservere in finishing a glorious battle. Furthermore, with the heart-breaking experiences of helping people, I realized the words which Mother Teresa had said:” love until it hurts.” Although we often get hurts when we love somebody, we still have to hold on. Do not give up. True love is unconditional. When we give out our love unconditionally, sometimes you may pay the price and sometimes you may be painful, but there may also be consolation, hope and joy. I long for giving this love endurence and tenderness.This kind of love makes me stand firmly, I believe I will overcome many challenges without fear.
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